Free Write. Typed at 300 mph.

Gertrude Stein  had something to say about this Free Writing business. So did Virginia Woolf. So it must work right? perhaps. Anyway here's another of mine:

It is with the utmost ambivalence that I approach this austere exercise: that of eliciting the most exciting extemporaneous text capable of being written by me, without recourse to lexical collections such as dictionaries and thesauruses. Or Thesauri if you would prefer.  It's a good and bad thing - or rather since this is an exercise in word selectivity and associated appropriateness, it is both a beneficial and helpful practice whilst simultaneously being a tedious drudge through the blinding effort of disinterring and excavation words from the dusty cells,caves like crevices and deeply scored interstices of my brain.  After all if they (the words) have decided to absent themselves, go on self-imposed exile or even choosing the option of a more benign break such as a vacation from the all consuming effort needed for day to day living, that's fine. As long as you come back smartly when called.

The observant among you will have noticed that I am ferreting around at the moment trying to remember a word that I know which I fully intended to fit into the last sentence but which steadfastly,obstinately,and with the adamantine bloody-mindedness that I have come to learn about when this kind of dispraxia, decides to bring its awkwardness to the game - it won't come until I have stopped thinking about it. Ceased to pontificate, to ruminate, to think deeply as the cogs in the brain squeak around desperate for the oil I am in the process of squirting all over them. Is there another word for squirting? Spilling suggests droplets with no force greater than gravity propelling them along, rather than additional kinetic energy which the image of squirting seems to conjure. Blasting is a bit extreme - although a blast can be relative I suppose.  I can imagine writers desperate to avoid cliches could utilise a verb like 'blast' to describe a kind of emphatically energised application of something that might be used for exaggerated effect - like blasting a verruca from the foot. Do you really? I think rather you are seeking to ease the verruca from the foot with the gentle application of medicinally proven pharmaceutical cream rather than aiming both barrels of a Martini Henry at the blight, but such is the desire to see the aberration gone, the foot holder wants to blast it to Kingdom Come - such is the contempt with which it is held and regarded. Extra force brought to the image, induced by the hurtful ire the person would undoubtedly feel for the affliction - 'I'll blast it off the face of the Earth,' might well be a sentiment that lacks logic - but putting cold logic to one side and emote a bit more and yes, you would want to blast it to Hell. And that's just a verruca a small plantar wart lesion that appears on the sole of the foot and has the temerity to resemble a mini cauliflower.  Not exactly pancreatic cancer. What would be needed if one maintained such  metaphoric grandiosity: a scud missile aimed at the solarplexes? a nuclear bomb blast piped down your throat.

Recourse to overstatement is understandable in these situations. The worse the condition the more fire added to the ire. Back to that break which actually wasn't a break but something undergone by students who look to take a year off, or a professional who feels that the time is right or ripe to drop out of the usual routine and take a - damn it's gone again. Its gone. It's swirling around in the maze of my conscience looking for the exit door. It's ascending stairs, practically falling down others, glancing concernedly at signs and maps to help the navigational process. Perhaps stopping occasionally to ask a passing emotion or a wandering word or trivial memory nugget not being summoned whether they know the where the exit is.

Other items who happen to be travelling sedately from brain to mouth towards the exit or various exits might tire of seeing this fool flailing around without a clue - too tight through inactivity and self-imposed inertia to purchase a helpful navigation aid - something like a helpful link. Links are thing that help out in situations nay crises like this. The links can act as guides for the blind the deaf and the disoriented - but if you're too good, to cool even to bother forging links you are guileless as well as guide less and your efforts will be thwarted, curtailed, blocked off.  And that's what we're experiencing here - a blockage.

Blockages can be avoided.  Links will ease the paths of the seriously lost or those who have lost direction in all senses of the word. Has it lost direction in its deeper psychological sense - a direction in live to know where it is going and perhaps ultimately where it will end up. Or are we merely talking here about finding the way to the tongue from the deeper and dustier recesses of the brain - tucked being the folds, lodged in the dark and fustian corners where things like prompts and guides and linkages can't penetrate.

Penetrate to probe in and exercise a role that suggests that encouragement under pressure will caused those who are either racked with timidity or timorousness or lain injured or stagnant through obesity.  Penetrate and his friends extricate and release should bind together, pool their redoubtable resources and bring forth those who find through time and inactivity an ability to move into the light.

Extricate and his cousins extrication and extraction can only really mobilize when locate and penetrate have completed their tasks. Find and bring to safety.  Locate using all his perceptive senses will use his own helpers - intelligence helping elves will scour around asking questions positing answers from lies and drawing enough strands out to bring to the chief of this area Intelligence.  He (intelligence) will then formulate a hypothesis through a narrowing down through selectivity of information of most probably areas where the word might be hidden might just be. Once he has the information it is within his demesne he can make a judgement about where the search teams might prioritize their future efforts if the search is to continue.  At the moment he's thinking that the word might begin with the letter V. A valetudinarian? A valetudinarian is someone who things he has multiple diseases, I think - perhaps someone who claims to have so much he habitually weakens any assertion he might  have that has more than a grain of truth to it. Victor, veracity voracious, vulpine veracity, vinous, viscous vampish, vicarious. Nothing to find there.

All interesting in their own right. A winner, a truth, something that resembles a fox, something that resembles food and wine, a fluid of dense and sticky quality that reduces stress on other material, a description of feminine activity suggestive of overt flirtation, and something that is associated with liability through a third party (all have been guessed at and no apologies will be forthcoming to excuse the erroneous content of the definitions found theretofore). But perhaps not even V. It still hasn't arrived. Intelligence is going to have to muster  its helpers - bring in the team leaders of instinct, a branch of memory called conversational snap-shot, contemplation, readers-write and quiz-master and brief them on what it needs to make a better hypothesis. Then the search and rescue squad can get in find their hostage, kill off any shacklers, slackers, binders and de-motivators, and bounce our victim - because yes it is a victim, into the open for use. Conversational snap shot is on his feet and speaking let's listen to what he has to say:

 'I have to say that I do recall an instance when this word was used.  It was during the hosts time on the Divisional Group when he addressing his team leader a certain Mr Philpot.  He said to Mr P 'I hope you enjoy your such and such as you deserve it.' The intimation there was that this break in the normality of Mr P's life was to be welcomed and nourishing in both body and soul and that this break is something that is looked forward to - not in the manner of retirement where all is behind you, but in the manner of I've worked really hard for a period of time and I wish to opt out of this for indeterminate amount of time but usually not.' exceeding one calendrical year.'

Intelligence: Think hard snap-shot try to recall the exact conversation'

Snap-shot: I believe Mr P said something like 'You're right, if anyone deserves a blank it's me. I've been at this particular grindstone for thirty five years and I've still got ten to go before early retirement.'

Intelligence: Grindstone Snap-shot? Did he really say that or are you allowing Imagination to infiltrate your memory. Is he there playing with the precision of your memorizing, filling bleak gaps with colour for the future betterment his skills when they are called upon.

Snap shot. 'You might be right intelligence. Imagination does play havoc with the specificity of my accounts.  It's as if one pause gives him the opportunity to inject an element of overt fictionalization possibly for his own and no-one else s benefit. I'm doing my best to accurately recall the finest details of the utmost veracity, I turn around and always he' there interjecting with things, weaving descriptive spells that are so interesting and fill the void so beautifully I sometimes feel powerless to resist them.'

Intelligence:  Pull yourself together snap-shot.  You occupy a very different thought area. You are to do with facts. Your milieu  is in the frozen image and the exactitude of detail contained therein.  His area is the dramatic, the poetic, the creation of vibrant moments - he knows little to nothing of the real truth. That said I know where his skills can take us when the facts are in short supply. I admit that his wayward way with things might help here - come up Imagination let me interrogate you - entrance yourself, let the nonsense flow - we're getting nowhere with facts.

Imagination: Thank you.  I was wondering when I was going to be recruited into this... sham. Surely everyone knows by now that what I have is the ability to construct a wondrous framework from which facts can be plucked. I can use image and colour and ludicrousness to create things. Chaos theory is my specialty. There is always order from mess if you know where to look.  From the farrago new truths can be deciphered and grafted onto facts with pegs that link all the way metaphorically speaking, to the Moon and beyond. I always say we can work in co-operation. Cohorts rather than adversaries. Blended skills for ultimate solutions. I can fly like a butterfly, flit from one word to another and cover everything in a cloud of gold-dust, fine as talcum. I can sew the finest filaments of silver into the drabbest of material, pull and stretch and engorge anything with colour, everything that comes my way.  And that's what you will get you back - a word that looks like an elephant in a purple onesie wearing a gold papal cap and rollerskating to the tune of I Was Kaiser Bill's Batman whilst a flapping sign around its neck reads... 'sabbatical' which is the word you've all been looking for, am I right? I know I am.  I'm not alone, there's loads of us on the right side that are ignored during these deep thinking times. Our job is to make memory memorable. Why would you not trust us.

Intelligence  All right imagination I get your point. Sabbatical. Well done.

Tests 1 and 3

This test which with astonishing creativity I will call number 3, will differ in that I will have help eliciting words (in this case between a and e)  using a thesaurus or dictionary. Each word will be selected for interest and usability - there won't be any of those specialised words that are too obscure to ever remember to ever be of use. I will then free write using as many of them as I can.

aggregate agrarian apologia assimilate abbreviate ambivalent androgynous asymmetrical arduous
bailwick baulk  benevolent burnish
corrosive cavil couch cumbersome cross-grained conflate connivance conjugal churlish cynical
diametric diatribe didactic disputatious disparage disposition disputatious disparate
excoriate excrescence execrable effectuate effeminate estimable

The number of apples found in each of the barrels amount to an aggregate of 40. Aggregate means a combined quantity of something so the following synonyms could be considered cluster, agglomerate or accumulation.  One shouldn't be confused by aggravate which is a very different word which suggests that something has been interfered with to the annoyance or discomfort of the thing itself.  Worsen, exacerbate intensify would be used in mitigation perhaps which would lead to a more vexatious state. Vexatious: a state of enhanced irritation. Irritation could also be classified as annoyance. Annoyance might be something that irks someone to the extent that they would become irrationally angered even it the object of that irksomeness is trivial.  Trivial means something that lacks serious significance.Trivial Pursuit nothing if not a masterpiece of self-awareness-based marketing where the subjects within the quizzes and the questions, despite often containing elements of interest, were essential trivial to living a full life. No-ones was ever enhanced by knowing that banana oil was obtained from coal - though I'm sure a few trivial victories were won answering questions of similar obscurity. Obscurity is a place that someone might emerge from or disappear into if they are not or no longer occupying a high profile or public faced existence. Existence is the occupational position of something that is opposite to not being present. If in existence then it is there to be seen heard touched felt or smelt or otherwise perceived. Perceived is something that can be sensed either through the traditional senses or through something that might be termed a sixth sense where an awareness is conceived through an unrecognized sensory route.

The fatigued detective frail from overwork and fraught from the disruptions in his private life feared failure above all other things. He had hoped that following his promotion that the panegyrics foisted on him as he flew outrageously through the ranks, that his fortitude and fearlessness would not be exposed as a facade: solidified fluff rather than the tensile robustness of the verifiable truth capable of surviving the hammering rigour of an interrogation. Failure in the hot seat was not an option for him. But if these interrogators attempts to drill down through what they might view as a friable personality ready to crumble the moment added pressure was applied, his confidence could conceivably fade, evanesce or shrivel in the face of hard facts fastidiously forged in the minds these formidable persecutors who would only ease off if if they could penetrate the dubious veneer of those fictive accounts he has already tried to promote as verifiable facts rather than delusional falsehoods.

Tests 1 and 2 Part One

A small experiment which helps locate and identify the words that are closest to the skin of my brain and from which my day to day oral sentence structure is most likely to be composed. Composed as in made up, not fallaciously but elementally. Elements are pieces or portions of wholes - so in this case a sentence is a whole and the words are unifying elements within it. Punctuation being the joints in the sentence nexus or chain. Nexus means a connection or series of connections linking two or more things. Understood, in the way of establishing a comprehension. Understood in clarification - to understand means that you have comprehended the implications of the matter under discussion. Discussion is an interaction between correspondents which it is hoped will form a consensus. A consensus is an agreement put together through a mixture of ideas, some in unison others which might offer a contrary view. A view in this context is a position of knowledge held to be true but perhaps subject to challenge. A challenge is an adversarial position the holder of which seeks to question something through the weight of his own argument or evidence. Evidence is that which is presented to back up an argument as near as incontrovertibly as possible.  Incontrovertible means something that might be sufficiently compelling as to resist evidence to the contrary. Contrary is a positional state that suggests other views are closer to the truth. The truth is something that has had its veracity tested and has proven itself to be so. So, in certain contexts, can mean much or more as in I am so cold - it's a intensifier. Intense might be a psychological state of mind where tension has invaded the ability to think as clearly as one would do normally. Normal means a generally or generic state that is is perceived as having a wider acceptability. Accept means to agree to receive something - this could be either an insult or an accolade.  An accolade is a symbol of praise which might find its way into a eulogy or any other speech about citing positive achievement.  Achievement is something that has been managed perhaps against expectation and perhaps through overcoming certain odds. Odds could describe a state or position where two antagonistic or opposing views are in dispute.  A dispute is when two or more people have different preferences as to the realisation of something. Something is a pronoun that might stand to represent another thing.  A thing - putting aside the famous John Carpenter movie from the early 1980s - is a pronoun that could be anything at all. All means everything - as in I have all the money so I have the total amount of money that was on offer.Offer means that someone is suggesting that something is available to them. Them takes us momentarily back to 1970s films again - but whereas the likes of Carpenter made trendy classics of the future with atmospheric mood music and iconic 70's stars drilled in expert pacing - the likes of Them were always regarded as B movies which never came close to classic status - the best they could hope for was to be considered cultishly fanzine rather than anything that stacked up as art. Art is always an interesting one - something created that provokes an emotional response - and no that can't be a queue for the supermarket check-out because that is an adventitious creation rather than the result of someone's vision and subsequent endeavour. Endeavour might be the 'held back for dramatic effect but probably wasn't even known by his creator until the mystery generated its own interest,' first name of the fictional detective, Morse - and also the name of a famous ship captained by a certain James Cook. But for literary purposes it is an act that has earned the right to be considered a successful  achievement through hard work possible against general expectation.  An expectation is something that is thought to be a sure outcome. confidence in this outcome allows perceptions of expectation over hopeful eventuality. Endeavour is often a slightly back handed compliment that suggests someone has done well despite having to overcome seemingly unsurmountable obstacles such as being regarded as moronically useless. Useless is word that expresses utter contempt and condemnation about someone or something. It is a monument to concision expressing a vote that the thing in question is without a shred of redemption and beyond all hope. Hope is an unfulfilled investment of optimism that fuels feelings of positivity and is suggestive that something will turn out for the better. Better means something is subject to amelioration or that someone is experiencing an upwards trending arc of improvement. Improvement is a beneficial progression from a baseline normal through to a higher attainment.

That's a trickier test than it looks. But I think it's quite effective as I'm being made to think about word meanings - even if most of them are quite easy - but in terms that could conceivably be understood by someone who perhaps doesn't know them (non English speaker perhaps).  It has additional benefit of making my grey matter turn over a bit.  My brain, a bit like my back garden, is looking (feeling)  a little sterile.  In need of weeding and enlivening. In more ways than one it's a little sluggish. It's gone hard and impenetrable - dried up a bit and in need of nourishment if there is to be any regrowth and vibrancy during the spring. Some of this will happen naturally. Organically you might almost say. The sun will come out, bringing its life force and enrichment - but some help at ground level will always help our inching towards bounty.  So I'm tilling my brain and sprinkling it with nutrients - bringing it into an awakened state, alert and receptive and able to bring forth into blossom and fruition all those seeds I have sown over the winter months and which have lain in the dark, dormant though I hope, quite restive.

Note:  Its hardly surprising that some obscurities and archaisms are slithering on the surface of my brain when such commonplace words such as - I don't know: obscurity and archaism never made it. It only goes to prove it's the words that you are using most at the time that furnishes your day to day vocabulary. You are what you're writing and talking about at any given time. And perhaps reading.

Here is another little vocabulary test.  Going through the alphabet and writing down the first interesting word beginning with the relevant  letter. Some interesting ones popped up - which in many ways was the point of the exercise. Each time I paused for in excess of about 10 seconds I went on to the letter beneath the one I was struggling over. I placed a small caveat in place that each word had to spelled correctly at the first go to continue. This was to stop the usual outcome of having huge volumes of words beginning with e and s and p for example and hardly anything beginning with some of the less common letters. Interestingly, to me anyway - some of the words are satisfyingly obscure and aren't happily accepted by blogger - but are confirmed by on line dictionaries.

amiable assiduous assume axiomatic arduous amity anonymous anodyne ameliorate analogy ambivalent ambiguous amiable asinine avid amorous antediluvian anachronistic asserted autodidact attenuate amatory affiliate axiomatic autonomous
bestiality bemuse ballast banal  benign  bovine badger baleful burnish brutish barrier beatitude bucolic bacchanal bumptious bemuse
curious curio corpulent candid chimera cavil caveat contemporaneous contumely chastity cliche curative cursive cartography chime churlish chippy charismatic caveat cineaste chaste canard curvaceous capricious cynical cupidity crepuscular ceremony corrosive cascade colossal chiaroscuro cosmopolitan crepuscular calumny corrective chaste chimera covetous chirk coruscate
deposition duplicity diabolical detrimental deprecatory depreciation duality deposition damask deleterious desecration divination duress devilment dullard deemed duped
 dubious dubiety dilatory divinity demerit diametric devilry density diligence divergent demystify debilitate dulcet
effulgent efficacious eminent enervate emulsify egalitarian equality emulate estimate estimable esurient escapade exaggerate exigency exemplify egregious exiguous empathetic edict euphoric euphoric euphony
fatuous, fulminate fructify farinaceous foment fulminate fastidious feculence fimbriated finesse forestall
gracile gutsy gormless gravid garrote gregarious gallimaufry grume gussie gasconade gluttony grilling gelid
harbor, husbandry harridan heinous haphazard humanity horology humanistic horrify hermetic Hellenistic hasty hegemony hubris hubristic heuristic heterogenous halcyon
insipid instigate insinuate implicate inviolate immolate imposition instrumental; innocuous invoke immediate invidious  immensity insensibility insidious immemorial invoke induce indignant indigenous infinite infantilise indicative inane intrepid impervious impeach indigent incisive inchoate impregnable immutable intolerable intestate imperious induce
jurisprudence jurisdiction jejune Jeremiah jazzy juvenile juxtaposition jocund Jezebel judicious justice jilted jerrybuilt jocose jubilant Janissary jilted
kismet kinetic kaleidoscope kludge kinetic kinesthetics
licentious lucid levitate lurid laminate luminous litigate litigious lambaste luminescent ligament laudable lascivious
magnanimous moribund missive manifest municipal  mitigate militate minatory minion metastasized mutate mutable mandate meretricious mellifluous miscegenation
numinous normal nutritional nutrient neophyte nepotism narrative nefarious nerve nervy navigable normative naiad nary nominate narcissistic nebulous  naivety nubile nullify
oleaginous obstreperous ovoid occlude ominous ossify orgulous outlandish opprobrium oppositional ostentatious
punitive paunchy proliferate parsimony putative perambulate prerogative plaintiff pawky pusillanimous pastiche perennial paracide pre-empt pretext presume portability portmanteau
quiescent quiver quintessence quire quagmire quiddity query quisling
ructions roustabout rifle ruritanian riparian rumpus rhetoric ruse rapidity rapacious restive recidivist reconnoiter  rhomboid rampant restitution rally rebarbative ruminate restorative
serendipitous suppurate slippage serenity saccadic symposium stertorous sycophant scalding studious stymie
tribulation tariff turgid truism transparent truculent traipse tremulous tinnitus trafficking trollop truism traipse tentative tumult tendentious tenebrous  testify transnational transient truism trite
ubiquitous ululate unctuous unperturbed   umber unified underwhelmed unity utility usury underscored underwhelmed.
vituperative vexatious voracious vixen vim votive vamoose vacuum venting veracity vacillate vastness vulpine vertiginous verifiable
whimsical whimsy worthwhile wily worthy wrestle writhe wraith without withal winnow warmonger welfare whim wretched wassail wrested wary warfare

Bit of a smorgasbord as the Swedish might say.  I wonder how many other words have been imported in by that language. Ombudsman perhaps: a person who acts as a trusted intermediary between an organization and some internal or external constituency.  A word used generally as a reference to kind of final referee who will make the fairest and final decision. Orienteering. Another Swedish blow in which I guess replaces running around with the aid of maps as navigational devices. Can that really be Swedish? What about orient? Orient as far as I know describes a process of establishing location or position through interpreting the available information.  Or, to determine one's position with reference to another point.  Perhaps the Swedes just took a word and applied a relevant suffix to it studiously avoiding any of their Æ, Ø, Å type letters so that as a putative global sport and pastime it would be accepted and embraced. Who knows?

As far as the rest of the words are concerned in the above list it would take a long time to write definitions of them all - even self-made ones.